Ten days ago, my husband and I said goodbye to our two-bedroom apartment in Newport Beach, California, and made the three-day journey back to where I was born and raised: Shawnee, Kansas. 

And today—June 29, 2024—marks one week of being here. 

We decided to move for several reasons—eight of which I’ll dive into in this blog. 

But first, a quick look at our time in California…

In total, my husband and I lived in Southern California for 8 years…

• 4 years in Azusa, California (for college)

• 1 year in Burbank, California (post-college)

• 3 years in Newport Beach, California (post-COVID & getting married)

I wouldn’t trade these years for anything.

Did it feel like I was surviving more than thriving most of the time? Yes.

But it gave me what I came seeking nearly a decade ago: time and space to grow up—away from where I grew up.

Over the past decade, I’ve been able to discover, refine, and prune my core values…

I learned that I’m nothing without Jesus.

I learned that I feel most alive when exploring a new national park.

I learned that I really love cooking nutrient-dense meals for the people I love, making my own non-toxic products, and supporting eco-friendly brands and biodynamic farms.

I’m not saying you can’t do this in your home state…

I’m just saying that life may feel so comfortable and routine that you don’t see a need to make any changes to your health, habits, relationships, or hobbies in the first place.

I know this would have been the case for me at least…

When I left for college back in 2015, my dad told me not to become a crazy California tree hugger.

Now, all these years later, I’m returning to my roots ready to build a compost bin in the backyard, grow my own fruits and veggies, and frequent our local refill shop to keep my plastic waste at a minimum. 

If I had stayed in Kansas, who knows whether I’d have the same love and appreciation for God’s creation…let alone a deep calling to steward it. But boy, am I glad that I do.

So in a nutshell, I am wildly grateful for the years my husband and I had in California. But now, I want to spend a few minutes sharing our reasons for leaving. 

I pray that, if you find yourself in a similar situation as ours, you may gain more clarity, discernment, and perspective on your next steps. 

The 8 Main Reasons We Moved From California

To commemorate our 8 years in California, I’ve compiled a list of 8 reasons why we’re moving. Let’s get into it…

1. To be near family 

We’ve been away from family for nearly a decade.

I’m not gonna lie…it was nice spending our young adult years in our “own state.” But eventually, you get to a point where you question whether it’s worth being away from them anymore.

For us, we reached that point this past January (‘24). It didn’t make sense being so far away, especially when we want to start having kids in a few years.

My mom sent me this Reel on Instagram the other day and I immediately started tearing up. Needless to say, we are ready to be near family again…no matter how dysfunctional they are ;)

2. To pay off debt

Jordan’s newfound obsession is Dave Ramsey, so we’re committing this next year to Step 2 of his 7 Baby Steps: Pay off all your debt. ✅

Right now, our debt is as follows:

• $47,000 in student loans

• $26,000 in car loans

If we had stayed in California, it would have taken us AT LEAST 36.5 months to pay off this debt. And that’s a conservative number. In all honesty, it probably would have taken us double the amount of time.

But in Kansas?

We can pay off 100% of our debt in 12 months. Maybe less.

The main thing that’s fast-tracking this is my parents sacrificing their empty-nester life and letting us live with them rent-free for a year.

This is a HUGE blessing that we do not take lightly. Thanks mom and dad <3

3. Slower, more peaceful pace of life

When you grow up in a place WITHOUT sirens blaring by, airplanes flying overhead, and light pollution pouring into your bedroom at night, city life can slowly eat away at your inner soul (it did mine).

All that to say, I never got used to the noise pollution in California. It grated against my ears every single day, and it eventually got to a point where all I wanted was peace.

In stark contrast, this is a video I took when we went back to Kansas to surprise my dad for his 65th birthday this past April (‘24). It has become my happy place…luscious green grass, birds chirping, not one tall building in sight.

4. Ability to buy a house

I think everyone in the U.S. world knows how pricey California real estate is.

I recently had a coworker tell me, “I don’t know how anyone other than the upper upper class can afford to live there.”

Now, I’d say that I have a pretty optimistic mindset on most things in life, but when it came to buying a house in Southern California…I just didn’t see it happening. (Not in the near future at least.)

When you’re shelling out $3,200 in rent every month, have two student loans to pay off, plus a car payment, and oh, you need to put food on the table…money goes quick.

It would have taken us at least ten years to save up for a down payment. (And that’s for a house without a yard…)

In Kansas, we can buy a 3,000-square-foot house with a huge backyard in the next few years (for $400,000ish). The same thing in California would be $3 million, minimum.

5. Has all four seasons

Like clockwork, I would get homesick every single fall while living in California. 

Fall isn’t really a thing there—especially on the coast…

The leaves on trees don’t turn red or orange, the air doesn’t get crisp, and pumpkin patches are laughable—and hot. 

To me, seasons are sacred.

They represent how humans should go about their year: Blossom in the spring, grow in the summer, reflect and prepare in the fall, and rest in the winter.

And when it comes to winter…

I see these colder months as the ONE time of year that gives you full permission to slow down and rest. 

When you live in the Sunshine State, there’s always a reason to be on the go. Explore a new national park? Sure, let’s do it. Go to the beach? Why not. Grab cocktails at that new restaurant? Count me in.

P.S. If you’re feeling burnt out or exhausted with life, I HIGHLY recommend John Mark Comer’s book, The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry. It teaches you the sacredness of stillness, solitude, rest, and the art of slowing down.

6. Money goes a long(er) way

On our drive from California to Kansas, I listened to an episode from Bailey Van Tassel’s podcast, Garden Culture.

She and her family recently moved from San Juan Capistrano, California (which was 25 minutes south of us) to the outskirts of Nashville, Tennessee. And in this particular episode, she was sharing their reasons for moving. And let me tell you…I was nodding my head in agreement for the entire 35 minutes.

Long story short, she explained how she and her husband had prosperous careers that were bringing in good money—good money! Yet they still felt like they were treading water.

This is exactly how Jordan and I felt. 

We kept coming back to the question of: How are we bringing in this much money but we STILL feel financially strapped?

And we don’t even have kids yet!

Kansas allows us to take a giant sigh of relief when it comes to our finances. 

We went to a farmer’s market in Kansas City this morning and filled two whole bags with fresh produce for a whopping…$18.72. Now that’s what I’m talking about.

7. A greater capacity for our passion projects 

Jordan and I are two creative people with a lot of ambitions in life…

Jordan wants to direct movies one day. I want to write books, lead retreats, and who knows what else. 

Kansas gives us the much-needed opportunity to slow down, be inspired, and stoke that inspiration.

We were able to do this to some extent in California, but our time was more limited. 

If you’re not working in California, you’re…

• In traffic (Jordan’s commute to work each day was 3 hours roundtrip)

• Walking your dog (not because you want to, but because you have to #noyards)

• Fighting for a spot at the grocery store, at church, at the beach…pretty much anywhere you go

• Figuring out how to make more money because your two full-time jobs aren’t enough

• And this list doesn’t even take into account our social lives!

That said, we feel grateful to step into a season of life without a Google Calendar that has been maxed out six months in advance. 

8. The cons started outweighing the pros

It was last October (‘23) when the cons of California started outweighing the pros.

Jordan and I made one last-ditch effort…

Our logic was that if we were to KEEP living in CA, we’d just move south to where the pace of life was a little bit slower, more family-oriented, and you weren’t surrounded by millionaires and their luxury vehicles at all hours of the day.

So, we spent one Saturday morning scoping out a few small homes around Laguna Niguel and San Juan Capistrano that we’d saved on Zillow. And after the first one—which was the size of a postage stamp…with no yard—I had a breakdown. 

I cried full-on tears outside of a 1.5 million dollar home that we couldn’t even afford if we wanted to.

That’s when reality hit us. 

It wasn’t realistic trying to build a family in California when all you wanted was a home and a big yard for your dog and kids. 

California is one of the most beautiful places in the world, but it’s also one of the hardest places to live.

One can only keep up with the ever-increasing rent, gas, and food for so long. Sure, there are millions of Californians who hustle 24/7 for years on end to make ends meet…

I’m just not one of those people. I don’t want to spend my life living paycheck to paycheck. I don’t want to be financially stressed bringing a kid into this world. I don’t want to feel financial tension every time our friends invite us out to dinner. These things should be the least of my worries. 

So, after countless hours writing in my prayer journal and countless more hours of conversation with my husband, we feel peace about closing this chapter of our lives. 

Despite the growing pains of change, we know this is a huge step in the right direction—for us and our future kids. 

So who knows what the future holds…

We don’t know how long we’ll be in Kansas. We don’t know if we’ll ever be California residents again. We’re just trying to trust God as much as we can throughout this season of unknowns. And that’s all we can do.

xx,

Caroline